Waiting for today...: Article: Self-Esteem for Children

Monday, August 24

Article: Self-Esteem for Children

Looking back on years of bullying and the impact on my self-esteem, I got to thinking about other causes of low self-esteem...

Oh how terribly I wanted them to suffer.  I wanted the news of my death to haunt them indefinitely.  Too bad I wouldn’t be around to watch.  What a disappointment. ~ Excerpt from an early draft of Trying Times.  

Writing my last piece took a lot out of me.  As I reflected on one of the most difficult and lonely times of my childhood, I found myself again mourning loss.  Namely that of missed opportunities, to pursue interests, and chances to have an enriched life.  I cursed my lack of coping skills and resilience!  I cursed my insecurities and timidity! In that very moment I hated my life.  But unlike times past, I eventually picked myself up and began to meditate on these things.  

When I discuss rejection, as it relates to my depression, I often admit that I was a timid child.  But I can never go on to give reasons why.  I just don’t know.  Until now I viewed timidity and insecurity as an outcome of rejection and abandonment; the latter I have yet to explore.  But as I continue to explore other consequences, I realize that I grossly underestimated the impact of self-esteem, rather the lack thereof, in early childhood before I moved back to the States.

Insecurity and timidity, or shyness, is actually a result of low self-esteem whereas low self-esteem is a result of rejection.  Entering the Philadelphia public school system helped to exaggerate my low self esteem and expose just how poor my coping skills were; nonexistent, actually.  As stressors multiplied, I didn't reach out for help.  Should I have known to do this?  Did I even feel safe to?

What a heavy burden to endure as a child and for so many years without a means of healthy release.  For me as an adult, it's a startling revelation.  The following article discusses what self-esteem is, why it is so very important even from birth, and what adults can do to foster healthy self-esteem in children.

Children are not born with self-esteem. It is learned through how parents and other important people feel about them, and treat them.

Part of self-esteem is feeling that you have a place in the world where you belong – that you are part of a family where you matter. It is knowing about your roots and having confidence in your future…”

con’t reading “Self Esteem for Children” published at Women’s and Children’s Health Network. Retrieved on July 11th, 2015 from http://www.parenting.sa.gov.au/pegs/peg28.pdf